If you child is screaming, shut it up or find out why it is screaming.
I don't expect a shopping mall to be quiet. There's too much stimulation for children. However, if your howler monkey has enough sheer lung power to cut through the clutter of a Friday night food court and drive me out of the mall from 50 feet away - you have a problem.
I don't know why it is screaming. It doesn't look hurt. It is standing on two feet. There are no tears. Some sibling howler monkeys are standing next to it. Shrieks that would drive an army of banshees straight out of the depths of hell are emerging from this child.
If it is making enough noise to raise the dead and bury the living, either its appendix is about to explode or it really wants a damn cookie.
In either case, no acceptable parenting option includes standing around like a dime-store mannequin while your child shouts down the house. Is it hurt? Is it in pain? Is it in imminent danger of dying? No? Then cram a diaper, a dirty sock, a slice of pizza or a just about anything handy (other than your fist - hitting is never an option) into its mouth.
Do humanity a couple of favors. #1) Don't breed. #2) Pay some attention to your kids. #3) Distribute earplugs.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
11 comments:
I concur.
I am the mother of four most of the time pretty good kids. Now, unluckily one of my children has some serious behavioral issues, one of which, the slightest thing can set her off into a tantrum. And when I say tantrum, I mean the "OMG the world is ending and I'm going to let everyone know it!" Other times, no matter how many times she may be corrected to stop doing something she will continue to act out. Now, when this happens, if we are out in public, be it a restaurant, be it the grocery store or even our local Warehouse (no WalMart's here in NZ) - we do a very simple thing. We calmly tell her that the behavior needs to stop...ONE TIME...if the behavior does not stop within a minute of us telling her this, either my husband or myself if we are both there will take her out to the car till she calms or if it's by ourselves with her, we leave. Very simple, very effective. Now, my child (btw, she's 4) has SEVERE behavioral issues. She honestly does not realize what she is doing is "wrong" - but I am NOT going to submit other people, who are trying to enjoy an outing or just out to shop, to her behaviors. I'm the adult here. She doesn't know better, I do. Oh and by the way, my other children? Ages 11, 5 and 2? Same rules apply. If they act out, they know, they get ONE warning then it's bye-bye. Guess what? I'm told I have some of the best behaved children in town.
Hitting isn't an option?
Its worked quite well for a few millennia, and now all of a sudden its not an option?
I went to best buy last night to buy a new monitor, my 3 year old (4 in 5 days) decides that the end caps are his playthings and starts jumping on them, he is taken down and a smack on the rear brings tears and a promise to behave, but he didn't learn his lesson.
While browsing the speakers awaiting an employee to bring me the monitor from the back, my son decides that he is going to start whimpering like a dog, I tell him one time to stop, the next time it will be a backhand.
Five seconds later he decides to make another whimper just to test me, before it finished he had been backhanded.
A moment later his nose was bleeding.
I cleaned it up, asked if he ever wanted that to happen again, and got a definite no. Sure I felt like shit, he moved forward at the exact time I swung, but he brought it on himself.
We had no troubles the rest of the night, stopped for dinner, he ate all of his food and was a perfect gentleman.
Hitting is an option, its the final option, but in my house, its an option.
If you have the right to be a queer racist working at wal-mart, then I have the right to hit my child if I see fit, you do not push your agenda on others.
Other than that, I love your blogs.
You made your child bleed? Shame on you!
If my kids are shouting and carrying on...they get escorted to the bathroom and a spanking on the behind...if that doesn't work, we leave. I have only had to leave one time.
Hi I'm the kid that you made bleed, I'm a little older now and I don't ask you to play with me anymore. I ask mom if I can go next door to my best friend Sam's house, his dad is so cool He plays ball with us and swims in the pool with us. Hey now I'm a teenager and I don't trust you as far as I can throw you but, I do remember what you did when I was almost four so tonight when you came in to talk to me about why I don't talk to you I gave you MY backhand and ran out the door to jump in my truck to go to my girlfriends house and talk to her dad. He helps me work on my truck and we talk football. Hey now I'm a dad and I don't talk to you on Father's day because I am too busy trying to be the dad you NEVER were to me.
Thanks dad.
You know while I am a proponent of a spanking to get the point across if nothing else works, hitting on the face is not acceptable. Too bad someone didn't report you to child welfare services. Discipline your kids, but don't go overboard ok?
I guess you 2 didn't see the fact it was an accident? ( and no, I'm NOT the previous anony poster, though, I'm am the other parent)
The situation was called for, a smack on the mouth is perfectly fine, like the other anony said. He moved forward at the same time, putting his nose in the way. It wasn't like he was punched in the face.
and "fourYearOldAllGrownup" our son loves us still, even after that time and all of the other smacks on the ass. At least he has some semblance of discipline unlike those other brats running around that have had no punishing what so ever. If he ever pulls a stunt like you described, then he will earn his lesson when the locks are changed on the house and hes staying with a friend until he straightens his shit up.
A little discipline goes a long way. Sometimes shit happens and it doesn't go the way you planned, it, but there was no serious harm and in fact, he doesn't even remember it happening. So, how bout ya back off.. K?
You nuts are serious aren't you?
For MILLIONS of years (or thousands of your a moron) a knock upside the head has made all the difference.
I remember my mom smocking me in the mouth for screaming for some item I probably didn't need, it bloodied my lip, I was 7, and I will be damned if I didn't learn that screaming at the top of my lungs was not an option.
As for the "all grown up post", good one, but its been pretty well proven that as a person hits the age of 14 to 15 it is next to impossible to remember beyond the age of 6, I like your style though, obviously you never had your ass spanked enough.
As for my usual discipline, its a smack on the ass, if it doesn't stop, to the bathroom we go, if it still doesn't stop then my will is much much stronger than his, and I know how to distract his attention to other items. Its amazing how much an attitude changes when you take away a favorite toy.
Oh boy I can see the post now.
"hi dad, you took away my toys because I was behaving like a spoiled brat, now I hate you, you tried to teach me right from wrong but I grew up to hate you because you didn't gloss over my mistakes and made me actually face them ..." and on and on.
Oh and all grown up, enjoy that truck, you wont be seeing it for a while after I report it stolen and leave your spoiled behind sitting in jail for theft for the weekend.
Your friends Dad may be the perfect pop, but then, his wife probably hates his guys and is cheating on him, and he has a really unnatural fondness for children.
Get it through your heads people, you are their PARENTS, not their friends. Once they respect you as a parent, then they can like you as a friend, but never let the respect wane, or its allover but the bail.
well said...
i agree completely with you - hitting is NEVER an option.
hitting enforces the idea that violence is the way to get your way and to make others do what you want them to. my son is 17, well behaved, polite, gets good grades and is well spoken. he's a pleasure to be around and i did not spank him. his dad did a few times before he was 4 and i put a stop to it. there are much better, longer lasting ways to get your point across and discipline your child. you never need to resort to violence when you have plenty of other forms of punishment to fall back on.
hitting is an emotion-driven punishment and that is NOT the way to make a long lasting impression on a child. a parent who advocates hitting as a form of punishment can preach to me the virtues of it till they're blue in the face but i will never believe that there is a valid theory in favor of hitting.
i was spanked as a child and while it didn't "hurt" me, it also did not teach me the lessons intended. i learned to brace up, take the licks and it was overwith. there was no long term focus involved.
and hitting in the face - NEVER EVER EVER a good thing or a good idea. i would smack the bejesus out of some adult for hitting a kid in the face. i couldn't stand by and watch that without getting involved. what happens if they do something REALLY bad when they're 14? are you going to punch them in the nose? retarded and bad parenting - excellent =/
Wow, just WOW; to the second anonymous comment:
You had me in complete agreement & sympathy up until the end.
THEN, there was this: "If you have the right to be a queer racist working at wal-mart, then I have the right to hit my child if I see fit, you do not push your agenda on others."
I thought that was totally uncalled for & uncouth. You resorted to kindergarten name calling because he had an opinion you didn't like. Shame on you.
Post a Comment